• Do you end up with people you can "fix" or people who want to "fix" you? 

• Do you only learn what you want to learn, but resist learning vulnerable new things that lead to change? 

• Do you try to "do it all," but find yourself regularly exhausted and feel little meaning in life? 

• Do you find yourself taking on the aggressor and/or victim role most of the time? 

• Do you try to look all perfectly put together and have a hard time admitting you are wrong? 

• Do you confuse being "nice" and people-pleasing versus true compassion? 

• Do you always want to "fix" people or take the self-pity, "I'm helpless" role? 

• Do you act one way to one person and/or group of people, but act another way toward another group...? 

• Do you have a hard time asking for help, admitting weaknesses, and that you really don't have life all figured out? 

• Do you have emotional and mental rigidity—regularly not feeling deep emotions and locked to a particular way of old thinking without having an open mind for new facts?